It’s 6 a.m. on a quiet Wednesday morning, and I’m sitting here waiting for my grandbaby to wake up for our special morning time together, sipping coffee and writing. As I near the completion of my nutrition certification, I can’t help but reflect on my journey—my transformation, my desires, my goals, and yes, my purpose. I’m a midlife woman who’s seen her share of seasons, and I’ve learned that revolutionizing your life isn’t about chasing one “big” purpose—it’s about asking, “What is this time for?” and stepping into it with faith and action. Let’s explore how to do just that, wherever you are in your journey.

Reframing Purpose Across Seasons

For years, I chased the idea of a “big purpose,” thinking it was some grand, singular calling I’d discover in a lightning-bolt moment. But wisdom and experience have taught me that purpose isn’t a one-and-done destination—it’s not even about what we do. It’s about who we are. I’ve had many, many jobs in my life, many stages—from being a mother to performing, teaching, running a performing arts school, and now moving into wellness coaching. And the one stage that lasts—being a mom—is a calling that lasts a lifetime.

As I look back, I see the purpose ran through them all—it’s in who I am. When I opened my school, I thought, “This is it—this is what I’ll spend the rest of my life doing.” I had all these plans for what it would look like—I was going to grow the students, build a huge school, and create a vibrant hub for creativity and learning. But when the time came for me to close it down, I was so ready—in fact, it should have been sooner. I remember asking God, “Why did you have me open it if all you were going to do is close it—what was the point?” And He reminded me of my purpose because I did inspire students and left an impact—students today are still emailing me, thanking me, and sharing with me all that they are doing in their lives. Maybe my purpose was fulfilled for that time, and a new time was nearing.

As I move into my next stage, doing whatever God calls me to do for however long He calls me to do it (quite honestly, sitting in no-man’s land—having no idea what’s next—isn’t easy), I’ve learned to chill and let God unfold the doing for the purpose He’s called me for, just taking that first step. I know my purpose goes with me because it’s who I am, not what I do.

So, instead of asking, “What’s my big purpose?” I’ve learned to ask, “What’s my purpose now?” Waiting for an epiphany can keep us stuck, paralyzed from starting what’s burning in our hearts. I’ve found that if we just get started—even if it’s not the ultimate path we’re meant for—it will lead us to the right one. Proverbs 16:9 reminds us, “The heart of man plans his way, but the Lord establishes his steps”—God uses our steps to guide us where He wants us to go.

A Year of Transformation

This past year has been a whirlwind of transformation for me—some moments soaring, others a real struggle. My husband and I had just reconnected after 20 years of a stormy, rough-ride marriage—it was rough enough that even my son expected us to divorce after all the kids left the house, but instead, we decided to work through the past and recommit to our marriage. So, we were living like newlyweds, something we didn’t get a chance to do when first married, and it felt like a beautiful season of rediscovery. We’d uprooted our lives, moving to a new state, ready for a fresh start. I also started the deep work of healing from my own trauma: the perfectionism that kept me striving, the lack of self-worth that whispered I wasn’t enough, and the pain of abandonment, abuse, and feeling unloved. I faced regrets head-on, owning my mistakes and making amends where needed. Then there were the financial challenges—cleaning up the aftermath of closing a business during Covid, tying up loose ends that lingered like a stubborn fog.

Amidst it all, an answered prayer arrived out of nowhere: my daughter and granddaughter came to stay with us, turning everything upside down. They asked for a short visit, but a week’s notice turned into four months. Don’t get me wrong—I love having them here, but it wasn’t without its challenges. We were still camping out in a cramped apartment, so my dance room became a playroom, my dining room turned into my office, my husband’s office moved into our bedroom, and I lost my space. Crowded doesn’t even begin to describe it—but even when they’re grown, mamas will always mamas (and papas will always be papas) and drop everything for their kids.

I could’ve seen this as a setback, but God reminded me: this isn’t a loss of anything—this is the time for something else. That time became a season of building bridges in a strained relationship with my daughter and the blessing of having my granddaughter with me—a huge gain.

Healthy Regret as a Catalyst

Through this season, I’ve learned to lean into healthy regret—not guilt—as a catalyst for growth. Healthy regret, when we learn from it, can stir our souls to own and admit our mistakes, apologize, and steer us in a new direction. It’s not about sitting in guilt, because God has already forgiven us: “If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness” (1 John 1:9). In fact, Psalm 32:5 reminds us how guilt can be lifted through confession: “I acknowledged my sin to you, and I did not cover my iniquity; I said, ‘I will confess my transgressions to the Lord,’ and you forgave the iniquity of my sin.” And through that forgiveness, we’re transformed—2 Corinthians 5:17 declares, “Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed away; behold, the new has come.” Guilt keeps us stuck; regret, when handled with grace, moves us forward. Facing my regrets—whether it was past mistakes in relationships or business decisions—allowed me to make amends and find freedom to step into this new season with a lighter and wiser heart.

Practical Steps to Revolutionize Your Life -Leading Lady Style

So, how do you revolutionize your life, no matter the season? It’s about starting where you are and asking, “What is this time for?” Here are a few steps to get you moving:

• Ask the Right Question: Stop chasing the “big purpose” and ask, “What’s my purpose now?” Let God show you what this season is for, whether it’s nurturing family, starting a new venture, or healing old wounds.
• Start Before You’re Ready: Don’t wait for the perfect moment—it’ll never come. Take that first step toward what’s on your heart, even if it’s messy. Stay prayed-up and God will guide your path as you go.
• Create Space for Reflection: Carve out quiet moments (mine is 6 a.m.) to listen to your heart and God’s voice. Journal your desires, goals, and what you feel called to in this season.
• Build a Legacy One Ripple at a Time: Focus on the small, intentional acts that create lasting impact—whether it’s building relationships, pursuing a passion, or serving others. It’s not about grand gestures; it’s about consistent ripples that change the trajectory for generations.
• Lean on Faith Through Challenges: When life gets crowded—literally or figuratively—trust God to use every moment for good. Even the struggles are part of the tapestry He’s weaving.
  Revolutionizing your life isn’t about a complete overhaul overnight; it’s about showing up fully in the season you’re in, trusting God to unfold the bigger picture.

Connect with Being the Leading Lady

Ready to revolutionize your life and discover your purpose in this season?  Sign up for my newsletter and subscribe to Sharise Uncut for raw, real insights to fuel your journey. Oops, that’s my grandbaby waking up—gotta run… live with purpose, ladies!

~Inspired by a life of faith, dreams and determination.