Hey Leading Lady, let’s talk about something that can change the way you show up for yourself, your family, and your work—Emotional Intelligence. It’s not about being book-smart like those IQ tests we’ve all heard of; it’s about being heart-smart, and I’m here to walk you through it with all the love I’ve got for you.

What Is Emotional Intelligence?

Emotional Intelligence or Emotional Quotient (EQ) is your ability to truly feel and understand your own emotions, while also tuning into the emotions of others around you. Think of it as a superpower that lets you navigate life’s ups and downs with grace. Daniel Goleman, who brought EQ into the spotlight with his 1995 book Emotional Intelligence, defines it as the capacity to recognize your feelings and those of others, to motivate yourself, and to manage emotions well in your relationships. It’s like having a compass for your heart—helping you stay steady when emotions run high and connect deeply with the people you love.

The Five Pieces of EQ

EQ includes five key pieces that work together to guide you:

1. Knowing your own emotions (self-awareness)
2. Managing them wisely (self-regulation)
3. Finding your inner drive (motivation)
4. Connecting with others through understanding (empathy)
5. Building strong relationships (social skills).

Each piece helps you handle life’s challenges with a little more love and a lot more wisdom.

Why EQ Matters in Your Life

Research from Harvard Business School indicates that Emotional Intelligence, or EQ, counts for twice as much as IQ and Technical Skills in determining who will be successful. This success spans business, relationships, health, and every other aspect of your life!

A separate study from the Harvard Study of Adult Development, a nearly 90-year deep dive into what makes life good, found that strong relationships are the real key to happiness, health, and success, way more than money or fame ever could be. It shows that those with tight, loving bonds with family, friends, and community not only live longer and healthier but also tend to do better financially, all because of heart-centered skills like empathy and connection that EQ brings to the table.

Personal Power and Peace

EQ isn’t just a fancy term—it’s a game-changer for your life. On a personal level, it helps you stop being a slave to your emotions. Instead of bottling up feelings or lashing out, you’ll learn to handle them in a healthy way, which can ease stress, lift your mood, and even improve your physical health by lowering inflammation. Imagine feeling lighter, happier, and more in control of your own heart—doesn’t that sound like a gift?

Stronger Family Bonds

In your family, EQ lets you truly see and feel what your loved ones are going through. It’s the difference between just noticing your child’s sadness and sitting with them in that sadness, understanding it from their perspective, and helping them heal. It builds deeper bonds because you’re not just reacting—you’re responding with love and empathy, creating a safe space for your family to grow closer.

Thriving at Work

At work, EQ can make you a rock star. As a high-level manager or entrepreneur leading the charge, EQ helps you understand your team’s emotions, navigate tough conversations, and inspire trust, making you a leader people respect and follow.

As a staff member working alongside coworkers, EQ lets you connect on a deeper level, handle conflicts with grace, and build a workplace where everyone feels seen and valued.

How to Boost Your Emotional Intelligence

The good news? You can grow your EQ, and I’m here to help you start. Here are some heartfelt ways to nurture this superpower in your daily life.

Tune Into Your Emotions

Check in with yourself throughout the day—set a reminder on your phone to pause and ask, “How am I feeling right now?” Notice if you’re seeing things as they are or through the lens of your emotions. Keep a journal to explore your emotions, leaning into the discomfort of tough feelings without judging them as good or bad, and notice how your body feels—are you tense, heavy, or light?

Respond, Don’t React

When strong feelings hit, don’t react right away; take a deep breath, reflect, and gather more info if you can before responding. Take a moment to breathe deeply with your belly, count to ten before reacting, or even sleep on big decisions to let your emotions settle. This helps you stay grounded, whether you’re leading a team or working alongside coworkers. When those emotional storms hit, try this exercise

Connect with Others

To connect better with others, try putting yourself in their shoes—what might they be feeling? At work or home, look for common ground in disagreements, ask questions, and really listen before sharing your own thoughts. And don’t be afraid to talk to someone objective—like a trusted friend or a faith-based professional—who can help you see your feelings more clearly.

Overcome Negative Believing

Sometimes, our emotions get tangled up in negative thinking patterns that hold us back. If you’re struggling with this, I’ve shared some powerful strategies to break free in my post at Overcome Negative Beliefs and Behaviors—check it out to help you and your loved ones find more peace and clarity through EQ.

Curious About Your EQ Score?

Want to know where you stand with your Emotional Intelligence? Grab my EQ quiz here to see how you score, plus get more tips to boost your EQ and bring more peace into your life. These small steps can start making a big difference right now, helping you lead, love, and live with a heart that’s wide open and steady.

Take It Further with More Support

If you’re ready to dive deeper into healing and growing your EQ, sign up for my newsletter for more heartfelt tips and insights delivered straight to your inbox. And don’t miss tuning into Sharise Uncut , where I share raw, real conversations to support you on this journey—because you deserve every bit of peace and connection that EQ can bring.

Let’s embrace this journey of emotional growth together, with hearts open wide, mending through love and thriving in connection.